From the Wire

2 Jelly Beans and a Half Cup of Lemonade — The Messiest Willy Wonka Event Ever

For $45, you, yes you, could have experienced what parents are calling “an absolute con” of a Willy Wonka experience. In Glasgow, Scotland, children and parents were promised a magical journey filled with things like “an enchanted garden, with giant sweets, vibrant blooms, mysterious looking sculptures” by an event called Willy’s Chocolate Experience, organized by House of Illuminati (we know). What they got instead had kids crying and parents calling the cops.

After attendees showed up, they were greeted with a dirty warehouse sparsely decorated by a small, inflatable bouncy house, laughable AI renderings of candy lands, and one Great Value Oompa Loompa (or “Wonkidoodle,” as an employee revealed) who looks done.

Refreshment for the kids wasn’t much better. One person said, “The children got two jelly beans each…and then they got a half a cup of lemonade.” The reaction to the event was so bad that it was canceled early, but later arrivals weren’t informed. This maelstrom of messiness was what led to the aforementioned cop calling.

The House of Illuminati has offered over 800 customers refunds, though, so there’s that.

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